Friday, December 19, 2014

a poem by author gary pelow

shaved to quickly, hands are shaking with fear, chin is bleeding, razor cuts the skin like my loneliness cuts my heart, fear is all around, of enemies unseen and seen, telling which ones are real or not real is difficult a task indeed, intention tremors, they are called, from caffeine and zyprexa, yet people accuse me and my tremor on street drugs, more false accusations against my person, someone always trying to punish based on lies plus intimidation, how do i defend with out screaming obscenities in anger, revenge or retaliation are pointless, you can not calm suspicion with blind rage, which only brings more judgement and punishment, the blood  is drying, an irritant, they will think i was punched and assaulted upon my person, no these cuts like symbolic ones are accidental , self inflicted, dark, cold grey weather today, to reinforce my cold loneliness, i seek new challenges while seeking no more delusions and hallucinations, i tire of schizophrenia, a burden my mother had in herself, and coped with the vodka of russia, and died from the practice, one day at a time, i move and i heal, there is still a future as long as i breathe,

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